This time of year is a time where we celebrate a story of joy, underpinned by a theme of hope, but for many those two things – joy and hope – are not their reality. For many this time of year brings hardship. I don’t expect to be able to fully speak to that, but I was just reflecting on a great thought from Henri Nouwen in his work, ‘Life of the Beloved.’ It may have something to say to the brokenness many feel. You are chosen.

…… we often suffer our whole life long from a low self esteem that can lead easily to depression, despair and even suicide.
In the midst of this extremely painful reality, we have to dare to reclaim the truth that we are God’s chosen ones (he doesn’t mean ‘chosen’ in the competitive human sense that excludes some, but in the sense that includes all… it is up to us whether we choose this reality or not), even when our world does not choose us. As long as we allow our parents, siblings, teachers, friends and lovers to determine whether we are chosen or not, we are caught in the net of a suffocating world that accepts or rejects us according to its own agenda of effectivity and control. Often this reclaiming is an arduous task, a lifelong work because the world persists in its effort to pull us into the darkness of self doubt, low self esteem, self rejection and depression. And this because it is as insecure, fearful, self deprecating people that we can most easily be used and manipulated by the powers surrounding us. The great spiritual battle begins – and never ends – with the reclaiming of our chosenness. Long before any human being saw us, we are seen by God’s loving eyes. Long before anyone heard us cry or laugh, we are heard by our God who is all ears for us. Long before any person spoke to us in this world, we are spoken to by the voice of eternal love. Our preciousness, uniqueness and individuality are not given to us by those who meet us in clock time – our brief chronological existence – but by the One who has chosen us with an everlasting love, a love that existed from all eternity and will last through all eternity.
How do we get in touch with our chosenness when we are surrounded by rejections? I have already said that this involves a real spiritual struggle. Are there any guidelines in this struggle? Let me try to formulate a few.
First of all you have to keep unmasking the world about you for what it is: manipulative, controlling, power-hungry and, in the long run, destructive. The world tells you many lies about who you are, and you simply have to be realistic enough to remind yourself of this. Every time you feel hurt, offended or rejected, you have to dare to say to yourself: “These feelings, strong as they may be, are not telling me the truth about myself. The truth, even though I cannot feel it right now, is that I am the chosen child of God, precious in God’s eyes, called the Beloved from all eternity and held safe in an everlasting embrace.”
Secondly, you have to keep looking for people and places where your truth is spoken and where you are reminded of your deepest identity as the chosen one. Yes, we must dare to opt consciously for our chosenness and not allow our emotions, feelings or passions to seduce us into self-rejection. The synagogues, the churches, the many communities of faith, the different support groups helping us with our addictions, family friends, teachers and students: all of these can become reminders of our truth. The limited, sometimes broken, love of those who share our humanity can often point us to the truth of who we are: precious in God’s eyes. This truth is not simply an inner truth that emerges from our centre. It is also a truth that is revealed to us by the One who has chosen us. That is why we have to keep listening to the many men and women in history who, through their lives and words, call us back to it.
Thirdly, you have to celebrate your chosenness constantly. This means saying “thank you” to God for having chosen you and “thank you” to all who remind you of your chosenness. Gratitude is the most fruitful way of deepening your consciousness that you are not an “accident”, but a divine choice…… we can decide to be grateful or bitter……